Caption Competition 7: Tactical Nuclear Penguin

Caption Competition 7: Tactical Nuclear Penguin

Win a bottle of Tactical Nuclear Penguin and a Punk IPA T-shirt delivered direct to your door!

If you need some inspiration here is the video of how the beer was made:


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Paul Salmon 11.01.2010 @ 6:57pm
Warning: This is not a short-legged flightless bird with webbed feet and wings modified as flippers.

Alan Taylor 04.01.2010 @ 3:06pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin - The titanic strength beer that isnt afraid of icebergs.
Alan Gibson 04.01.2010 @ 3:44am
The other 3 always knew dad had a favourite - he was always allowed out at night.
paul ashby 02.01.2010 @ 6:58pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin - Outright winner in the cold war.
Chris Flaherty 22.12.2009 @ 10:31pm
Buy a bottle of Tactical Nuclear Penguin from the BrewDog shop soon: stocks are already severely depleted! (Warning: TNP may cause radiation sickness in large quantities)
carlos thomas 22.12.2009 @ 6:07pm
Rise of the Penguins
Mark Connelly 17.12.2009 @ 11:09pm
Penguin did not understand the fuss about Twitter and just wanted to hack the f*cking Pentagon.
Katie Pizzuto 17.12.2009 @ 6:08pm
Never tell a penguin he can not fly, for he will throw on his best tuxedo, get a flock of his friends, hijack your private jet while his buddies distract you with silly penguin tricks, and drop a tactical nuclear weapon on your sorry ass, all while sipping a fine stout and defiantly flipping you the bird.
Frederick Toon 17.12.2009 @ 4:16pm
The bosses at brew dog were hoping after 3 bottles of Tactical Nuclear Penguin people would not realise they had mistakenly ordered a crow costume.
michael Reinhardt 15.12.2009 @ 6:50pm
Having been abused by humans, this flightless bird decided to fly some nukes their way.
Alan Robertson 15.12.2009 @ 3:30pm
Hmmm.....these internet dating sites gives a whole new meaning to the phrase p-p-p-pick up a penguin!
michael Reinhardt 14.12.2009 @ 7:49pm
Mactical, Tactical, & Fantastical.
Chris Jones 12.12.2009 @ 1:46pm
After drinking three TNPs in rapid succession, Dave frantically searched NHS Direct for a cure for Penguin Mutation Syndrome...
Shizuka Ikeda 11.12.2009 @ 7:47pm
Pingu was desperate to find someone who would deliver a bottle opener before Christmas.
John C. Robertson 11.12.2009 @ 6:33pm
Because it was Christmas Pingu was on the computer planning a stealth attack on James and Martins adversaries hoping they would go cold turkey by use of tactical nuclear beers and a semi-automatic trifle.
Fluff stuff 11.12.2009 @ 6:22pm
Deer, Santa, sorry I mean Rudolph and Santa .I have been a very good penguin this year and would like a beer and a few more beers with maybe some extra beers thrown in for good measure. Lots of love ,Pingu XX
Fluff stuff 11.12.2009 @ 6:14pm
Skipper of the Madagascar Penguins used the world wide web to launch a tactical nuclear strike against the Portman group.
John C. Robertson 11.12.2009 @ 6:03pm
James and Martin were getting a bit cheesed with the evil Portman group so they asked the Madigascar Penguins explosives expert to help them out.
Lloyd Chambers 11.12.2009 @ 4:43pm
p-p-p-pick up a penquin...? god, i need three bottles to blot out the memory of my youth and those bloody chocolate biscuits...
David G 11.12.2009 @ 1:05pm
What to call it? Tactical Nuclear Bottle Bomb? Nah, better make it catchy.
Bryan Spooner 11.12.2009 @ 10:09am
No one could quite understand why he was wearing a blackbird costume to advertise Tactical Nuclear Penguin. But with three nuke’s in full view on the table, ready to explode, no one dare ask.
Will 09.12.2009 @ 9:02pm
DO NOT update your facebook status after a drinking a TNP. (Otherwise you will have to put on a penguin suit and hide in a waddle of penguins for protection from ridicule)
Pete Di-Murro 09.12.2009 @ 8:06pm
An apple (mac) and a beer a day keeps the frostbite away.
Peter Di-Murro 09.12.2009 @ 7:57pm
As black as the driven snow!
Pasi Aapala 09.12.2009 @ 10:13am
After three of these you too will be out cold like me...
Danny J 08.12.2009 @ 10:00pm
Frantically searching for refridgerators, Pingu knew it was only a matter of time before his T.N.Ps EXPLODED.

One was already smoking.
Hugo Arasanz 08.12.2009 @ 7:34pm
The Artic is melting, Humans have gone too far. Now the penguins will avenge the agony of their land sending this weapon of mass destruction to civilization. The end is near...
Sam Rodwell 08.12.2009 @ 5:51pm
The Penguin was just about to settle down for the night with a bottle or two of Tactical Nuclear Penguin (cause everyone knows Penguins have a far higher tolerance of alcohol) when he noticed that someone had disagreed with him online. He put his glass down and furrowed his brow, this was unacceptable...
phil dalgleish 08.12.2009 @ 12:56pm
getting fed up with the penguin porn, moved on to looking at the polar bare.
Loz 08.12.2009 @ 11:08am
The real source of those Nigerian spam emails is revealed...
Hugo Arasanz 08.12.2009 @ 9:47am
The Artic is melting, Humans have gone too far. Now the penguins will avenge the agony of their land sending this weapon of mass destruction to civilization. The end is near...
fred toon 08.12.2009 @ 9:22am
short, Stout, dark, attractive fun loving, and tasty..... The dating agencey results were not quite what Penguin was expecting.
Jon 08.12.2009 @ 12:24am
Man, there are far too many entries. Waddle I do to stand out?
Stuart Last One Reekie 07.12.2009 @ 9:14pm
Great to share? Shame the labelling means its not available in the colonies...
Stuart Reekie 07.12.2009 @ 9:03pm
After half a glass of this stuff, *I* would believe I could fly!!
Stuart Reekie 07.12.2009 @ 8:59pm
The bastards couldve offered me a straw....
fluff stuff 07.12.2009 @ 8:35pm
Calling International Rescue. Help my zips broken and I am bursting for a piss.
Andrey K 07.12.2009 @ 3:52pm
Cant fly, only levitate
craig garvie 07.12.2009 @ 6:25am
When the Tactical Nuclear Penguin when Rogue Brewdog released there new beer Shark, to try and contain the Issue.
Regan Marshall 07.12.2009 @ 3:01am
Little did he know that internet predators were far more dangerous than the sharks from his past.
Mark Rollason 07.12.2009 @ 1:49am
A tactical nuclear penguin may not be able to fly but this is 32% proof they can surf
Edward 06.12.2009 @ 10:59pm
The Penguin searched for an arms dealer to sell the Tactical Nuclear Penguin too. On eBay he found the White Bear. Now they are friends and plan to stick it to the Man.
Euan Kennedy 06.12.2009 @ 9:40pm
This is not just a penguin...
This is a Tactical Nuclear Penguin
Kynon 06.12.2009 @ 6:57pm
The penguin was so caught up in his game that he forgot to drink his beer...
David Smith 06.12.2009 @ 3:37pm
Right, now all I need is some fingers...
Jordan Fetfatzes 06.12.2009 @ 6:09am
Penis enlarger? nice, im so clicking yes
Euan 06.12.2009 @ 1:36am
Dear Brewdog,

The beer arrived, and tastes wonderful. However, I think you may need to add a side-effects section to the label.
jim donoghue 05.12.2009 @ 11:23pm
If i keep staring at it long enough it might do something!
Si Fraser 05.12.2009 @ 9:39pm
Mr Penguin was getting weary thinking of a way to reword, if you thought our 18 percent beer was bad, wait till you get a hold of this one Portman Groups Code of Practice!
Ben Topping 05.12.2009 @ 8:22pm
Brewdog save the day once more with their revolutionary Home Guard.
peter the great drunk 05.12.2009 @ 6:59pm
Tomorrow I will stop drinking...
taco 05.12.2009 @ 5:12pm
too much Brewdog may have been the reason Linux sales always suffered behind Windows...
Jared Hamilton 05.12.2009 @ 3:28pm
They say 100 chimps with 100 typewriters can produce Shakespeare. Who knew that one penguin with one macbook could lose all of Brew Dogs assets to an African Prince.
Ron Olding 05.12.2009 @ 1:19pm
Cold my ass , this beer is just cool .
James 05.12.2009 @ 11:57am
What are we going to to do tonight Pengy?
Were going to do what we do everynite Pingu, try and take over the world!!!
Ryan Maines 05.12.2009 @ 6:48am
Why do i always have a look of constipation upon my face?
John Golden 05.12.2009 @ 2:58am
FT Tactical Nuclear Penguin ISO Bruery Black Tuesday
Toby Darling 05.12.2009 @ 2:15am
What`s the matter stout boy, afraid you might taste something?
Big Tex 05.12.2009 @ 1:04am
Heh. They say everything is bigger in Texas.
Matt Stark 04.12.2009 @ 11:17pm
Apple Macbook Pro - £1,849.00
Tactical Nuclear Penguin - £35.00
Badtz Maru caught masturbating - Priceless
david creighton 04.12.2009 @ 10:01pm
after his 8th sip, penguin started to think Anne Widdicombe was worth a shag
Chad Montgomery 04.12.2009 @ 9:40pm
Yes, finally a beer named after me!

Michael Reinhardt 04.12.2009 @ 9:34pm
Weather outlook for all Pumans: Thirty-two outside, Thirty-Two beside.
lt 04.12.2009 @ 8:42pm
gerai kerta i kausa
Christian Saint 04.12.2009 @ 8:04pm
Tactical nuclear penguin tastes so good the penguins want it back!
Martin 04.12.2009 @ 7:59pm
Macs: So cool even the Linux Penguin uses one.
Dave 04.12.2009 @ 7:11pm
I can sadly report theres no big deal with this TNP stuff. Portman - dont waste your time. Ive been sipping it all afternoon and feel as healthy a dog now as this morning.
Simply Beer 04.12.2009 @ 6:44pm
Why? Cause we CAN!
kenneth wilkinson 04.12.2009 @ 6:43pm
Brewdog master spy Pen Guin finds proof of Irans Nuclear Capibilities.
Dave 04.12.2009 @ 6:41pm on the suit, the glasses, scooped the TNP .. but no, I still cant see the 3D!
Jim Alexander 04.12.2009 @ 6:01pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin....Truly Near Perfection.....but,...neads more Fish!
John C. Robertson 04.12.2009 @ 5:57pm
Even ugly birds start to look good after a bottle of this stuff
John C. Robertson 04.12.2009 @ 5:49pm
Osama bin Penguin was plotting ways to defeat the evil Portman empire by using his stealth secret weapons of mass intoxication.
Lawrence Browne 04.12.2009 @ 4:11pm
Footage obtained by Her Majestys Secret service confirm the rumours that the UK was about to enter a new cold war.
mK 04.12.2009 @ 4:03pm
stop this white stuff! Black is an essence of cold! Go for the black side of drinking!
Dave 04.12.2009 @ 2:34pm
~......likes; swimming, fishing & micro-lights, W.T.M. like-minded for TNP & maybe more!~

Te He - another one for the cellar..ho ho ho..
Dave Hardcastle 04.12.2009 @ 1:37pm
Penguin in Threat of Nuclear attack . So decides to line them up .....
John 04.12.2009 @ 1:32pm
Dear Portman Group...
Russ 04.12.2009 @ 12:25pm
Mac release new MacBook micro, advertised as being: Smaller than a penguin!
magicdave6 04.12.2009 @ 10:14am
Once iv drank all 3 of these im going to glass myself.
Bryan Spooner 04.12.2009 @ 9:53am
How do I have a full glass, yet none of my bottles of beer are open? TNP, things aren’t always as they may first appear.
mark donnelly 04.12.2009 @ 8:44am
TNP,Total Neverending Pleasure
Andrea Reinhardt 04.12.2009 @ 6:56am
A penguin with three nukes at the helm -- safer than most legislation.
Ryan Maines 04.12.2009 @ 5:56am
Im a Mac and i drink craft beer.
Graeme 04.12.2009 @ 1:15am
Single male penguin seeks friend for Plutonic relationship.
Wez 04.12.2009 @ 1:14am
All you need for a nuclear winter!

Good work guys keep it up :)
Jon 04.12.2009 @ 12:17am
The beer sat forgotten, as he stumbled across furry sites and a whole new world opened up.
GaryP 03.12.2009 @ 11:43pm
Dear Portman Group,

If I am so ruddy irresponsible, how come I know how to send emails and that!?

My chum Sid the Cheap Cider Snake is outside stealing a traffic cone, go grouch at him instead!

John fay 03.12.2009 @ 11:22pm
if this is the result of a few lads with too much time and too much money on there hands , me thinks this should happen more often!!!! viva la penguin!
Colin Venters 03.12.2009 @ 11:02pm
Beer, penguins and a Mac. I thought I had seen everything on the internet, but I suppose Rule 34 strikes again.
william 03.12.2009 @ 10:48pm
Jesus Christ one bottle and i am Donald Duck
Jim Alexander 03.12.2009 @ 10:45pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin ........ Truly, Near PERFECTION!
Bryan Spooner 03.12.2009 @ 10:34pm
I hate caption competitions on the interweb. But I really need a T-shirt, so cold. hhmmm, maybe a few of these will help me think of something witty and interesting.
Jim Liebnitz 03.12.2009 @ 10:17pm
Now how do you get Club Penguin on this thing?
Gareth Young 03.12.2009 @ 9:29pm
Oh my God. He outbid me.
Mo 03.12.2009 @ 8:33pm
Sort out these melting polar ice caps NOW or I will press the big red button!
michael Reinhardt 03.12.2009 @ 8:08pm
It is better for a penguin that he drink and surf.
michael Reinhardt 03.12.2009 @ 8:04pm
Michael Reinhardt 03.12.2009 @ 8:04pm
I just did a write up to defend what you are doing against Roger Protz, maybe that is worth a bottle...although I did not write with that purpose in mind. thankheavenforbeer

Lindsey C 03.12.2009 @ 7:45pm
Parental powers prevent penguin porn playing. Penguins peeved.
Toby Darling 03.12.2009 @ 7:23pm
Next person who asks if I use the same barber as Bart Simpson will become intimate with my rage. TNP - Take No Prisoners
Erik H 03.12.2009 @ 7:11pm
Finally the government figured it all out, it was that dangerous new brewery who had made Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot the creature he is today. With tactical nuclear methods the Brewdogs had created a dangerous supervillain-beer.
Jason Keith McCoy 03.12.2009 @ 7:10pm
Poogling for a higher cause.
Andrew Montgomery 03.12.2009 @ 6:39pm
P-P-P-Pick up a penguin off the floor after one of these!
Andrew Montgomery 03.12.2009 @ 6:37pm
F5 is not the only way to refresh!
Andrew Montgomery 03.12.2009 @ 6:34pm
Iced Iced Babies....
tony killeen 03.12.2009 @ 6:30pm
luckily for penguin he had a few bottles of T.N.P. left cos there was nothing left in the brewdog shop!!!!
Dan weston 03.12.2009 @ 6:27pm
Pick up a Penguin on the brand new online dating site!
Ian Lunderskov 03.12.2009 @ 6:11pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin - this photo makes no sense, and neither should you.
john tague 03.12.2009 @ 5:55pm
his search history will be just hilarious tomorrow...
simon 03.12.2009 @ 5:42pm
after the third bottle penguin did not care about the melting ice caps.
Derek Freese 03.12.2009 @ 5:29pm
Shall we play a game?

Yes. How about Tactical Nuclear Penguin?
Ben Wideman 03.12.2009 @ 5:29pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin - because we live in a cold, cruel, delicious world.
Joe Clark 03.12.2009 @ 4:51pm
BrewDog Penguin is planning his next attack against his nemesis - Portman Polar Bear
Daniele 03.12.2009 @ 4:44pm
I spend a lot of money in beers, fishes and ice...the rest I just squandered...
bob farmer 03.12.2009 @ 4:43pm
take 1 golfer, 1 blond, 1 cadillac, a 3 iron and a bottle of TNP.....mix well and stand clear!!!!!
Blair Wilgus 03.12.2009 @ 4:43pm
15 inch Macbook Pro = £1300.00
3 bottles of Tactical Nuclear Penguin = £ 105.00
1 Penguin Suit Hire = £ 50.00
Photo of you you from the office party = priceless
Hilary Smith 03.12.2009 @ 4:33pm
Tactical Nuclear Penguin: Turning regular people into penguin furries since 2009.
Nick Sweetman 03.12.2009 @ 4:05pm
After three bottles of TNP no matter how hardcore the website Punky Penguins hair was the only thing that would stay upright
Ethan Rusin 03.12.2009 @ 4:04pm
This is your last chance Mr. President... 5,000,000 dollars or I release the penguins!!
moron4hire 03.12.2009 @ 3:56pm
This is relevant to my interests...
Peter Kindness 03.12.2009 @ 3:51pm
Lets see how many bottles it takes till I can understand what Pingu is saying...
Steven Pilkington 03.12.2009 @ 3:41pm
Need to chill out after a busy day at work? There is a beer for that
Ben Johnson 03.12.2009 @ 3:31pm
Im not sure if its me or the beer but that lady penguin is hawt!
Bink286 03.12.2009 @ 3:25pm
No Penguins (or apples) were harmed during the making of this picture.

Alan Taylor 03.12.2009 @ 3:19pm
A little bird told me that the anti-nuclear brigade have turned up the heat again.
Danny J 03.12.2009 @ 3:18pm
..there were three (pen)guin bottles sitting on a wall. And if one of those bottles, was electronically sold...there would be two (pen)guin bottles sitting on the wall.
andrew snedden 03.12.2009 @ 3:13pm
It wont just be penguins igloo-ed off their nut
Alan 03.12.2009 @ 3:12pm
Tom in Accounts sometimes took dress-down Friday a step too far
Chris Milton 03.12.2009 @ 3:11pm
bitches flew me all the way over to Scotland to help make their beer and wont cough up for flights back? Meh, at least they have Happy Feet on DVD.
Peter Kindness 03.12.2009 @ 3:06pm
Am I drunk or has Pingu just had a stroke?!
Lisa Rafferty 03.12.2009 @ 2:51pm
Brians sadistic ex got her last revenge - him in a penguin suit, with great beer, a Mac, and a freshly poured glass - and no hands to use any of it!! Perfect!
Jamie Sanderson 03.12.2009 @ 2:50pm
The morning after he realised with a grim look of embarrassment that he had not only left some beer untouched while trying to groom sea birds in his new disguise....he was using a Mac!
Stewart Daniels 03.12.2009 @ 2:48pm
After a hard day of spam emailing The Portland Group and finding out he the first to have his internet cut off under Manny new rules, TNP like nothing better then kicking back and drinking a few Tactical Nuclear Penguin brew
Geoff Coleman 03.12.2009 @ 2:43pm
...the value of the item is in the collectible container, not its contents...
Steve Armstrong 03.12.2009 @ 2:42pm
Co-ordinates set. Launch codes accepted. Launch Tactical Nuclear Penguin in 3...2...1...
Graham M. 03.12.2009 @ 2:36pm
All that time in casks and freezers, damn right Im dedicated, but all I get is this suit?! eBay...
Nathan 03.12.2009 @ 2:29pm
Dear Mr. Brown and Parliament,
Myself and the rest of the Brewdog team would like to see you attempt to file a motion against a penguin.
Tactical Nuclear Penguin
Stewart 03.12.2009 @ 2:23pm
As he struggled for inspiration in the caption competition the penguin thought a few bottles of Tactical Nuclear Penguin would get the creative juices flowing.
Claudiu Berbece 03.12.2009 @ 2:21pm
How can I get this beer in Romania? Seriously.
Anna Hitchcock 03.12.2009 @ 2:16pm
Chief Penguin drowns his sorrows after stumbling across a rather frosty article about Tokyo.
Chris Hickey 03.12.2009 @ 2:14pm
Remember, kids: Tactical Nuclear Penguin and Internet browsing do not mix.

Unless you wanted that picture of you with the goat you had made up like Lady Gaga to hit the photoblogs. In that case, go to town.
Stuart Mackinnon 03.12.2009 @ 2:12pm
As he watched them back on the internet, John regretted blacking up for the Kia Ora adverts in the eighties - too orangey for crows and far far too orangey for penguins.
R J Tysoe 03.12.2009 @ 2:02pm
There must be a cure for chilly willy on here somewhere!
James Finn 03.12.2009 @ 2:01pm
It seemed like a good the time
George Olivos 03.12.2009 @ 2:01pm
2 girls 1 cup. really?
James Bendall 03.12.2009 @ 1:57pm
Roger Protzs comments left Penguin feel cold.
karel de vlaming 03.12.2009 @ 1:55pm
Even a pengiun can be too drunk to use his linuxshell
James Allison 03.12.2009 @ 1:54pm
I told them I couldnt tweet, but would they listen?
Haunted 03.12.2009 @ 1:53pm
Dear Mr Nigerian Prince, do you accept fish?
Fred Toon 03.12.2009 @ 1:50pm
I said get me a Penguin Costume ..... not a bloody blackbird one, the clus was in the name of the beer you fools.
brem 03.12.2009 @ 1:47pm
Pingu had planned the perfect night in: a couple of beers and the chance to check out some chicks on the internet
Chris Myers 03.12.2009 @ 1:45pm
Goddamn it, who made porn of me and out it on youtube!
Tom Fyfe 03.12.2009 @ 1:41pm
right. bring on the polar bears.
andy 03.12.2009 @ 1:41pm
The penguin was glued to this video and wondered if it was possible to to teach @brakenbrewdog to fetch and open beer!